Wednesday, January 28, 2009

So much time has passed...

Wow...emotions are across the board today. Ashton is 12! My baby is really 12!! I'm not sure how to feel-I never imagined it would be so emotional for me. I guess 13 will be even worse-but we'll leave that one for a later date. I don't want to think about it now. I told her happy birthday this morning right after she got up, and she just grinned at me. She's hoping this will be the birthday she gets to start wearing make-up. I told her years ago that she would have to be 13, but I know she sees me faltering in my determination! I'm just not ready for that transformation yet-I let her wear make-up when we went to Disney in Nov and she just looked YEARS older. So, I am torn. Hold fast to her childhood, or give just enough to apease the beast? I already told her how limited her first make-up wearing will be, but she doesn't care...some's better than none, I guess. Anyway, when I dropped her off at school this morning, I actually got teary! You would have thought it was her first day of kindergarten or something! I stared at Emmie this morning after we got home trying to conjure Ashton's face at Emmie's age. It was easier than I imagined. (Of course, that may be a benefit of all my kids looking similar!!) I remember being so amazed that I could love another person so much when I'd just met them. She amazed me then, and she continues to amaze me now. She's so stinking smart-she never misses anything, and catches on to any and everything she learns the first try. She's funny and silly and girlie and (most recently) a (ripstick)skater chick wannabe and rainbow/peace sign lover. She's stubborn and argumentative like her dad (which drives me up the wall) but she is sweet and affectionate too-especially with our little ones. She loves animals and wants to be a vet when she grows up-and she wants babies! :) I am so proud of her, and so thankful to have her. Thank you Lord for the blessing of raising this wonderful gift!! And now I am tearing up again, so I am going to log off now. TTFN!
Jen

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